good people rock

i woke up to a NIGHTMARE. literally a puddle of water, our bedroom flooded! i've had a rough few months to say the least.. all i could do was laugh and cry, and think can it get any worse? then a knock at the door came and my entire day was changed. i received the prettiest flowers from some pretty amazing ladies. they started an instagram where they send flowers to ladies who are inspiring. are you kidding me??? i feel so lucky that they would think of me. it turned my entire day around and made me want to serve. it made me realize that i don't need to throw in the towel and eat a gallon of ice cream! if anyone reads this, (hi mom) go follow them @sisterhoodlovesyou

as of recent...

be still my soul on repeat because it's beautiful and a great way to feel peace

bills from hospitals and infertility clinics aren't the best thing when your trying to get over what could've been. 

SOUR candy and cadbury eggs are a must to cure a broken heart

having the best family and friends around. amazed at how you can find strength in others, people are so good

trying to find joy in the journey, i went to a place where I never want to go. have you ever woke up and just been so sad you physically can't move?? well that happened. i found it is normal and grieving is okay, i feel like i've been blessed to know a lot of joy. i never want to experience deep sadness the kind that blows. 

CA is never a bad idea. why is it that the beach can cure the soul? sandy hair and all. so nice the waves and seashells. sigh dreamy!

we had a WTF (what the freak) meeting with dr. foulk to talk about how we should move forward and what went wrong, he recommended that we start asap with our frozen embryos. yes i have 4 frozen babies, i'm scared but motivated to try again i just feel like i need time. time to get my body and mind right and strong! i have faith someday i will have my own little family. in the meantime i'm focusing on being the best bryn shumway i can be. 

i'm putting my trust in timing and learning that though it is not MY timing; it is his and he knows what is best for me

baby shum i love you, i will never stop fighting for you!

trying & the f word (fertility)

Well, hey whats up hello! I can't believe its been so long since I've wrote. I remember promising myself I was going to document life and take pictures of whats going on. I'm sad I haven't been better but determined to try. That is the first step right? "Trying" that kind of describes my TTC life. For you newbies TTC means, Trying To Conceive. Lets rewind things back about 3.5 years..

I have always wanted a baby, what girl doesn't. When asked what I wanted to be when I was little my answer was always the same. A mom. I grew up watching my siblings and having the best example of a mother. 

Hands down the greatest day of my life was marrying John. He really is the best. I remember November 17th being amazing. I walked out of the pretty white temple we were married in SO excited and happy with my decision. While on our honeymoon we talked about someday having a little family of our own and how magical that would be. I got butterflies. I always wanted to be a mom and Johnny was destined to be a dad. Life with John is and will always be magic. 

The birth control struggle was real. I always heard about it being hard but I never knew how hard. My body didn't like the pill. It made me not the Brynley I wanted to be, so I stopped. My cute friend told me about a shot you could get that for her had no strange side effects so I tried. First of all I hate shots, second it made me gain weight and made me feel out of whack. So we stopped. We figured if things were suppose to happen they would. Is this TMI????

Life has a way of making things crazy. After being off BC for a while I started to think what if I can't have a baby? I have always been really regular. I've never noticed anything out of the norm. I panicked I googled just about anything and everything. I cried, I laughed I got strange foot massages, and I did a different type of diet. NOTHING! Next step ovulation tests those should work. Next thing you know I had a smiley face, yippee maybe that means this month will be the month. Nothing. Month after month I followed the ovulation test and nothing. It is and was so disappointing I was devastated. I prayed I trusted in Heavenly Father, I still have faith. I finally sucked it up and went to the doctor. They checked everything out and said go home do the ovulation test for 4 more months and if nothing happen they will look into other options. The next four months we did just that and once again nothing. 

4 months. I made an appointment as soon as I could. I pretty much ran in. I wanted to know what was wrong with me and I wanted to fix it! This whole process has made me realize one thing and that thing is patience. It really is a virtue. *I'm still working on it don't judge:) The doctor said everything seems to be ok lets check your husband and then we will see if we need to do further tests on you. He did the test. He got the results and we were sent to a urology doctor. 

I had a call with a client so I couldn't go with John to the Doctor A little bit of time went by and I hadn't heard anything. Then I got a text that read "call me." My heart sank either way I was already feeling bad. To make a long story short they told John that he had to get surgery though it wasn't major. It is for something called a varicocele. We booked the surgery and were happy to have answers. The crazy thing is in male infertility 80% of men have to have this same surgery.

Fast Forward to today. The surgery on John has been complete and now we wait. The recovery process can take a few months. But boy do we feel blessed. I have faith everything will work out. BABY SHUMWAY I hope you know how much we love you. If you would just get your little bum down here we would be so happy.

xoxo- bryn
just cause gossip girl is one of my favs & who doesn't pretend to be blair waldorf?

my friends & family make me blush

How could you not feel so loved! So thankful for this video. Glad I will have it forever! 

xoxoxo

dreaming of sunny days

 Winter is great & all but lets be honest! Spring/Summer can't come soon enough. Today as my toes were freezing I was day dreaming of Snow Cones, Tan Skin, Beachy Hair, and Swim Suits. If you are like me you scout out good suits as soon as they come out. Call me crazy but a good suit is hard to find, let alone in your right size. So swoon with me at these beauties.

 

Best thing you will ever try. Surf Spray. I heard you can make your own which is rad. Mine has lasted a long time and I use it constantly. It gives your hair texture and that awesome messy beach look. Well worth the $25! Bumble and Bumble products rock!

Of course the treats. Yummy.

I could of done a dozen more!

Who is ready for summer?

 Let the countdown begin!

abandon blog

sitting her on this lovely saturday morning thinking to myself what should i do? clean nah watch netflix nah make brownies nah so this leads me to the great idea i should post on my abandon blog. alot has happened lately. me and #jshum got married went on a sweet honeymoon got a new job built a kitchen had christmas and rang in the new year! so many wonderful things have happened. it really is not always easy cheesy but it is worth it. i love the hard times we have because it makes us that much stronger. here is to new beginnings and trying a little bit harder to not make this blog abandon.

 also is anyone else totally addicted to Hunter Boots?

 love everything about them except the price tag.

i've been craving crepes on the regular! i love all the different combos.

i like how they look as pretty as they taste.
yummy

swooning

I love this babe with all my heart!

THREE WEEKS

333333333333
-side note-

three is my favorite number

if you know me you know about my OCD with it!

cant wait!